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Decisions about ashes

In the UK, around 75% of funerals involve a cremation and, for our families, this means deciding what to do with their loved one’s ashes. However, there’s no immediate haste to make a decision. You are welcome to take the ashes home with you for the time being or we can keep them safely on our premises.

If you do take the ashes home in casket, you could simply keep them in your home or you might want to place them in the garden. If you do decide to ‘bury’ the ashes, then we can suggest caskets which are made for this purpose and won’t split after time. It’s worth considering, though, that if you bury an urn in your garden, you may not always live in that property – so it might be sensible to consider a pot or similar container, which is portable. Of course, if you do move, you may simply leave them in that garden, knowing they were ‘at home’ there.

We offer a wide variety of urns and your choice will be partly dictated by what you decide to do with the ashes. If you are storing them at home – perhaps on a shelf – then we can offer some really stunning containers that will look beautiful in your home.

Urns range from fairly traditional to modern and are made from a variety of materials, including wood, leather and brass through to environmentally friendly banana leaf or water hyacinth. Urns are also available in Somerset willow with a natural cotton ashes bag inside. These can be square, rectangular or round and in gold, buff or white willow with plain or coloured bands.

In addition to burying them on your own property, urns can also be buried in a local cemetery – there are a number of options available at the Kent and Sussex Crematorium in Tunbridge Wells, at the cemetery in Herne Road, Crowborough or in a local natural burial ground. Some opt to have the urn interred alongside a loved one in an established plot. We can work with families to do this and can arrange for a small ceremony to take place with some readings etc, if this is required.

It's worth remembering that ashes can be split, which means that even if you opt for an interment, some can be kept aside for perhaps making into a piece of jewellery or scattering somewhere. It could also be that the ashes are split between family members, for them to make their own choice with what happens afterwards.

Scattering ashes is something many families decide to do and we offer a range of scatter tubes in different designs.

Some of our families chose to scatter their loved one’s ashes in a garden of remembrance – and that is possible at our local crematoria - or perhaps under a memorial tree. Often though families will take the ashes to a location which means something to their loved one – such as a favourite beauty spot or holiday location. It’s worth remembering that the ashes can be split and scattered several locations.

There are some restrictions on scattering ashes, but it’s generally fairly easy to do – particularly in a quiet location. We have also worked with some families to organise the scattering of ashes at sea.

Some families may want to scatter ashes abroad – it might be at a particularly special holiday location or perhaps that person was born in another country and you want to take a little of them ‘home’. Is it possible to take ashes overseas but it is sensible to take a letter explaining that you are transporting ashes and we can help families with this. We also suggest that they are transported in hand luggage.

As increasingly popular option is to have a small proportion of a loved one’s ashes made into jewellery or keepsakes. Here the ashes can either be incorporated into glass under heat, so that they are part of the piece – perhaps cufflinks or a ring. Alternatively, a small amount could be placed in a small ashes holder which can then be slipped into a locket or a paperweight for example. There are lots of options available and we can discuss them with you.

Please do ask us if you’ve got any question – we are always happy to assist with any arrangements as part of our service.

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